Conversations

I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act. G. K. CHESTERTON

 

Have you ever had a meeting or conversation that at first appears to be a happenstance? Have you wondered how a casual encounter can significantly impact the direction of your life?  I meet people and have conversations every day but seldom do I stop and think about the effect that those interactions have on others. Nor…do I take much time to reflect on how those conversations have affected me.  I’ve had several of these “happenstance” conversations that have changed the direction of my life.  Some positive in their influence and others not so much.  One such life altering conversation took place during my second year of college.

 

I had spent my first year of college at Moody Bible Institute.  I had gone there with the intention of getting a degree in Bible and then going into youth ministry but after my first year, fear got the best of me.  I looked at all of these dedicated, “perfect” Christians around me and I felt like I just didn’t measure up…so I left.  I decided to pursue some general education courses at the local community college.  After about a year and a half of trying to find my way, taking lots of different courses, I realized I was at a stand still in my life. I needed direction. It was about this time that my brother-in-law Joel, who has been a mentor to me, came and asked me if I would like to go along with him on a mission trip to Mexico. 

Joel was going as a speaker for this new organization called AIM (Adventures In Missions). AIM said that they could use some extra help and I had no plans for the summer. What a great opportunity; I had gone on mission trips before and really enjoyed them.  However, I had no idea what I would be doing.

 

On the plane to Texas, which was our launching point into Mexico, Joel and I had a conversation and it went something like this.

“Why did you leave Moody?”

“I don’t know.  I guess I was afraid that I didn’t have what it takes for ministry.”

“Why did you go in the first place?”

“Well, I felt like God was calling me into youth ministry when I was in ninth grade.”

“So what changed?  Was it you or God?”

“I am not really sure…probably me.”

“You know what I think you should do while we are on this trip?”

“No, what?”

“I think that you should take every opportunity to spend time alone with God, to seek after Him and spend time in prayer with Him.  Find out if you really sense that He changed that call on your life since 9th grade.  If you really believe that He has, you need to spend time figuring out what is next in your life, but if you still feel like He is calling you but you’ve just got scared and walked away, then you need to go back to Moody and finish what you started.”

 

When we arrived in Mexico, Joel introduced me to Seth Barnes…founder of AIM. I found Seth easy to talk to, he was real, authentic. He took time to hear my heart and my story.  After talking for a while he informed me that he was going to put me in charge of prayer for those next few weeks.  Without knowing anything about the conversation I had had with Joel, Seth shared that he had felt like I should use my time while in Mexico to seek God and His direction for my life. Amazing! God had given both Joel and Seth the same word for me…It was clear – I was to pray, seek God. 

 

Those weeks were filled with great times of prayer with and for students, leaders, ministries and the community in Matamoras. In addition I was given lots of freedom to just seek God in silence and solitude.

 

On one of the last days there, Seth asked if I would be willing to lead the morning devotional for the youth group that week.  In preparation, I spent the next day seeking what God would have me share.  I wish I could remember what it was I shared and then tell you that it was a truly amazing and inspiring message, but I can’t.  What I do remember was that I was in my ministry “groove”.  I knew that morning that I was enjoying this ministry time.   I was finding joy in ministering to students. It rekindled what I had felt God calling me too a long time ago.   I went away from that time in Mexico with the knowledge that God had called me to be obedient…and not worry about “measuring up”. On the way home, I informed Joel that I planned to return to Moody.

 

I am amazed at how God brings many of our relationships and experiences full circle! After 13 years in student ministry…I am once again working with AIM.  Who knew! I get to continue “student ministries” through the Ambassador program (1 month to 2 month long trips for students 15-18 years old). 

 

This story came to mind recently as I hung out with some of the leaders and students who will be ministering this next year at AIM’s base in Mexico.